The sun is shining this morning. Its cool and its windy but the rain has cleared and it looks like today is going to be a brilliant day. I hope that is the portent of things to come. Today is the day we go back to the specialist and find out if the radiotherapy has done what it was supposed to do. Its a funny feeling this . . . a part of me is being totally optimistic, and yet another part of me is terrified of hearing the worst. Does that show a lack of faith in me? No, I don't think so . . . it shows that I am totally human. I did not expect to hear bad news way back in November and I did . . . heck, I did not expect to hear bad news the day I sat down and a Doctor told me my daughter was developmentally challenged. Bad news is like that. You go in not expecting the worst and then it happens. I don't think you are ever totally prepared for it, even if you should be. So maybe the terrified part of me is the part of me that is prepared, or trying to be prepared.
I truly hope and pray that today will be a
day of celebration.
Older love. It is something completely different than younger love. You have had the moon and the stars and all of the giddyness that comes with young love, but your love has deepened into something much, much more than that. It is all of that, but it is also something else. It is like having the deepest, deepest affection for your best friend forever. Your BFF . . . All of the physicality and distractions of young love have been replaced with something much, much deeper than that. Oh sure, they can still make your heart race and your tummy tingle, but it is accompanied with feelings which transcend those feelings of your youth. It is not earth bound, but heaven sent . . . it is knowing this is forever and forever and forever and beyond what we know of now, something quite, quite eternal . . . with a magic all its own . . .
Nothing in life prepared me for this love I feel for my husband, and I discover a new layer of it with each day that comes and then passes. I look at him, or touch his hand and I feel everything . . . I so much wish that we could have known each other when we were much younger, had a family together, etc. But we were not blessed in that way. And yet at the same time I know how very blessed we are that we found each other eventually. I waited a lifetime to find this, and it is no less that what we might have had, had we found each other sooner, if that makes any sense . . . and I am not ready to let it go. I don't know if you would ever be ready for that . . . . it has taken us a lifetime, both of us . . . to get it right.
Grateful for the Temple and eternal
Grateful too that we did find each other, and for whatever time we have had, do have and ever will have. I know it is a special blessing that a great many people never find at all in this life.
The Missionary Sisters stopped by last night for a visit. We love them. We have a new Sister here now, serving with Sister N who is from South Africa. Her name is Sister Turnbull and she is from Melbourne, Australia. She's just lovely and amazingly she has only been a member herself for 3 years and is, yes, a convert also. It was so much fun getting to know her better. They shared a video with us before they left. I loved it. (Sister T is the one on the far left of this photo.) Sister N is such a sweet, sweet sister. She is so shy but she has a beautiful spirit and testimony. They will be so good together, because Sister T is very gregarious and outgoing. They are great gals!
Plus she was trained by Sister Fernandez who started her mission here in the Chester Ward what seems like eons ago! Wow, so much time has passsed since then!
I love it. Its all about not only dancing in life, but learning to listen for the music that goes with the dance. In other words yes, it is good to read your scriptures and pray and do all the things we are asked to do, but they have no meaning unless we hear and feel the beautiful music of Jesus Christ and the Holy Ghost that goes along with them. I am so grateful that I can hear and feel the music.
I will leave you with a thought for today and hope that tomorrow or even later today I will be back with some good news.
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˚ ˛ •˛• ˚ ｜ 田田 ｜門 ★
*.˛.Worrying is like sitting in a rocking chair.It gives you something to do but doesn't
get you anywhere. ~Unknown .° * 。 • ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ •
In The English Kitchen today . . . Braised Beef with a Peppercorn Sauce. So good!
Have a wonderful Wednesday. Don't forget . . .
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And I do too!